The Stories Told in the Dark

I promised transparency.  

Last night was a rough one.

In the dark and quiet of the night, my brain likes to tell stories.  They are simply that.  Stories.  A lot of "What Ifs".  What Ifs are just a game.  I know all this, but last night they were LOUD.  

I tried and tried and tried to sleep, but stories were louder, not allowing me to rest.  Thus...today I'm tired.

It is quite clear to me that my body and my soul need some care.  I work three very full days this week and then have a couple days off before dad's memorial service.  I'm begging my body to hold out just SIX more days.  Then I'm off for a week.  And my goals for that week are simply self-care.  The three things I want to accomplish each day are some meditation, good nutrition going into my body and movement.  I'm not saying "work out" but just some simple movement to start releasing some of what I feel is being stored in my body.  A little simple yoga and getting my hula hoop back on sounds like good places to start.  :)  It's time to take some care of myself.  I can tell if I don't do that soon, my body is going to force me to stop.  And I don't want to get there. 

But it's just one day at a time.  I worked this morning, came home this afternoon and made an hour and a half worth of phone calls. I'm tired of telling people my dad died. I'm actually stumbling over the words.  That tells me the shock is wearing off.  That is to be expected.  And another good sign that next week is important for me.

But until then...as always...one day, one night, one step at a time...