Bereavement Leave

* Pretty hair color finally done (Thanks Jade​!).

* Saw last client after a packed week of appointments. 

* Put my bereavement leave message on my voicemail and as responses in my e-mail accounts. I'm not pretending this leave is something it isn't...I'm calling it what it is.

* Pajamas are on. They may not come off except for the memorial service on Saturday.

* Received VM that my dad's body has been reduced to a pile of ashes.  I'm not pulling any punches my friends...that's how it feels when you get that call.  I know the true spirit of my dad, and who he was to me, was no longer in that shell, and that really, that shell was severely holding him back for the past several years.  Nonetheless...that doesn't mean there isn't any emotion to go along with that call.

* Glass of wine is poured.

* Rain is coming down hard outside.  It feels like the perfect bereavement weather.  Just please keep the power on Mother Nature! 

It's time for this bereavement leave to begin.  No work.  No appointments.  Just time with all my boys.  And time with myself to feel whatever needs to be felt and to take GOOD self-care.  A week won't be enough.  But it is far more than most people take.  I am practicing what I preach.  I'm going to cry.  I'm going to grieve.  I'm going to laugh and smile too.  I'm going to remember good times and be sad over what has been lost.  This is step One.  To feel all this.   And then I keep moving forward.  One Step, One Hot Coal, at a time.